God-given Refreshment

      Wow, it’s been a long time since I last blogged. I miss it. I have been at Hillcrest for ten months now. What have I learned? Lots. Lots and lots. As most of you know I started dating a wonderful man from South Carolina named Austin Mullet. :) I know, he’s a southerner, but give him a chance; he’s pretty incredible. :) My time here has been good, and I hope to return home mid-June.

      So what’s this blog post about? Well, I was having my devotions this morning. (Well, actually it was this afternoon. I’m going on night duty tonight so my days are mixed up.) Anyway, several weeks had passed since I had had my devotions. Yes, I said weeks. Why do I do this to myself? As usual, however, God was merciful and blessed me in the Scriptures He led me to read. The passage in my One Year Bible was quite timely. I am still in January, so my reading was in Genesis.  Rachel and Leah were having their squabbles and “baby wars.” Ridiculous, I thought to myself. First the reader thinks, “Poor Rachel, she was supposed to marry Jacob.” Then all of a sudden you have pity on Leah because Jacob loves her less than Rachel. God blesses Leah with sons, then Rachel, then Leah, and on it goes. When their sons were born, Rachel or Leah would say things like, “I know God gave me this baby because he heard my cry of distress.”

        I saw myself in this story. How many times am I “needy” for God? How many times do I pray selfish prayers, just asking God to get me through the day or through the current season? How many times could I have had peace if only I had asked God to be my stay? I run around in life searching for happiness, joy, and fulfillment in everything but God. As I read this passage, I thought to myself, “God, why did You still love them? Why did You still answer their prayers for children?” Then I realized that God does that for me all the time.  All the time. And I stand back, amazed, simply amazed, at a God who does not love us according to our actions. Why is that so hard for me to comprehend? I see now that I often think/worry that if I stray from God for too long he’ll eventually give up on me. But He does not.  Thank You Jesus He does not!

      So, wherever you are, child, do not be afraid of God. Do not be afraid that His love will run out. His love is limitless, and He is waiting on you.  Run to Him, with arms stretched out, and fall in love with the God Who made you.

An Evening with God

Allow me to take you to a place...
Have I been there? Oh yes. Did I take pictures? Of course. So why don't I simply show them to you? Ah, you see, I could. Maybe you 'd nod and agree that it is  a wonderful place. But, since I love you and wish to truly share this place with you, I'm taking you with me.
                                                                           
                                                                           ........

        Drive your car awhile. Sure, it's dark, rainy, and what some people would deem a good night to stay in. But you're anxious to get away. Keep driving, you'll get there! One highway sign. Is this the town? No. Sigh, Keep driving, you'll get there! Another sign. "Hollister: 10 miles." Almost there. At last you turn off the highway, and begin making your way to the historic district of town. 

There it is--the cafe everyone has told you of! Sure this place can't be everything they've told you it was. But you step out of the car. The first thing you notice is light. Not a bright street light, but a warm glow, and it's coming from inside the cafe. Laughter, gleeful, relaxed laughter. It creates an ambiance that simply becomes a part of your experience. Walking up the old steps, you open the antique door, no knob, just an old handle...Inside, you're surprised to find the place small. Not stuffy, not Victorian, but small. This kind of small makes you just want to fold your arms tightly and drink in the place. Everything is rustic, one wall is lined with fine wine; a low doorway leads to a second room with three people chatting, and the other end, a high counter. The man on the stool quickly arises to take his place behind the register. You smile, walk up to the counter, and confidently order the latte that is you. Now, I said 'confidently.' I don't mean that you are bashful or unaccustomed to ordering an espresso. I mean confident, because for once you are confident  that the barista smiling at you behind the counter knows exactly  how to make your drink. No hesitations, no worries of being offensive or "snobby," You order it, and happily stuff his tip jar for a job you know will be well done. While your drink is in the making, you wonder around aimlessly, taking in the place. The people are different, yes, and perhaps not the most comfortable crowd you've ever been in. But isn't it refreshingly original? No soccer moms, no kids screaming, no teenage girls who want their "expresso drinks from Starbucks," no businessman sucking up the free Wi-Fi.  You hear a a few thumps behind the counter.  Ah, how forgetful! This barista really is  making you an authentic latte. A smile lights up your face that goes all the way to your insides! He's almost finished, just a few more adjustments, then he smiles and hands you the latte you've dreamed of for ages. Take a sip. Mmmm...the espresso, that strong-almost bitter- taste of espresso. Oh how lazy your taste buds have been!
Now that you have your drink in hand, it's time to do more exploring. Take one last look at the creativity around you, and step out into the night. The tables on the porch still host the friendly laughter and light conversation. But look a little farther, past the porch. Lights, little yellow lights. What could be back there? Making your way off the porch to the other side of the shop, you see not just a few lights, but long, graceful strips of lights contrasting the dark of the night. What is this place? As you walk up the steps leading to the lights, you are surrounded by beauty. Wildflowers grow in random places out of the cracked stone floor. Metal tables are sprinkled about the place.  More gentle laughter. The light strings atop this...courtyard, yes, it must be a courtyard, they are perfect. You feel covered, but not stifled. The night sky is brilliant with God's own magnificent stars adding to the experience. You take a seat in the corner. Sure, the rain has dampened it a bit, but what does that matter? Take in a deep breath, and enjoy this place. Once again you notice the flowers around you. Looking more closely however, you realize these grow wild. No one tends to them. The wild green bunches add to the mystery of the courtyard, and you feel a part of it. "Wow," you think, "Can this place really be?" Drink in every bit of it, my friend, ever bit! Surrounded by all of this lovely, your heart is reminded of  God.  "Oh, dear God, why have you made this place for me? Everything is just so wonderful, and it floods my heart with joy!"

                                                                        ........
         
         So, do you feel like you were there? :) I most certainly hope so, my friend! And I pray that as God takes you to places like these, that He moves you.  Not in a forceful way, but in the way that a lover romances his beloved. 

Psalm 139:6

O Lord, You have searched me and known me.

You understand my thought afar off,

And are acquainted with all my ways.

But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether.

And laid Your hand upon me.

It is high, I cannot attain it.

Walk with God, my friend, walk with God!

Peace

She opens the door, 
Not all the way, no. Just a peek.
She knows what's inside is what she needs.
Inside is the joy she once claimed.
Peace. 
Ah, at one time she would have been bold enough
 To enter without a second thought.
But now? Shamed of what she'd become,
that's what she was. 
Relgion? Hard. Discipline? Harder. No,  make that 
Unattainable.
Deep inside, though, she craved.
Not chocolate, not attention, not even love.
She longed.
A small, gentle voice broke through her thoughts.
"Come, " the voice called.
 "Come." As if coming were as easy as walking.
The sweet voice calls,  
"Just take one step inside. Just one."
That voice, the light. Oh how she longs for freedom.
Fear. Anxiety. Shame. Distrust. Disbelief.
No. She won't. She longs to, but she will not.
Crushed, she sinks to the floorboards that glue her in despair.
Her tears fall unchecked;  she buries her head in her hands. 
"Why, Oh God, why can't I find freedom?" she cries. 
Attempting to wipe her face, she realizes the room is not dark;
She can see her hands. 
Could it be? No, surely not. Could she still be there?
She slowly lifts her head to see that soft-eyed angel. 
Her eyes, they beckon her to the light. "Come."
She rises, and with blind faith approaches the door.
"Take my hand, friend, and I will bring you to CHRIST."
The light-that light was a mere glint.
For as she entered the room,
She was met by an all-encompassing Glow.
Jesus. All she could see was Jesus. 
She started to speak a thousand times,
But was dumbfounded. 
How? Why? Every imaginable doubt was quieted.
Peace, be still.
Everything...was gone. Wiped away.
"Child, "He called, " child." 
She wept, and wept. And wept.
One word, one word, and He had said it all.

Running

My heart within me groaned,
An emptiness—no, a longing—for fulfillment burned in my soul.
I ran, my did I run,
To every place I knew that would bring me comfort.
And, for awhile, I felt in control.
Some time elapsed, and the busyness I’d surrounded myself with
Shook itself loose from my life.
All that remained was a lost little girl,
Shivering from the insecurity she still possessed. 
Why, dear God, do I run?
Why?
This little girl surely knows how to put on a mask for everyone else.
But You, Oh God, lovingly know me through and through.
You know my weaknesses, and You know my strengths;
You see me, all of me, and still embrace me with all Your heart.
I praise You, Lord! I give my life to You because You gave Your Son for me.
Oh let me always run to You God, to be held in Your warm embrace and never let go.

Living Life in a Stupor

     A stupor, that's what I have decided to call my attitude this morning, and yes, the past few weeks. I ask God over and over to fix my situations. “Take away this pain!” I beg of Him. It seems I cannot get past this wall, if you can call it a wall, in my prayer life. Somehow, I think that I will not truly be happy until He has granted my wishes. Whatever happened to “My thoughts are not your thoughts; your ways are not my ways”?  Discontentment settles in, lack of patience. Yeah, about that patience thing…never really been a strong point in my character. 

     While reading my Bible this morning, I kept searching for that moment. You know that moment too if you are a Bible-reading Christian. It is that moment in the morning when, after crying your eyes out the night before, you reach for your Bible, deciding that reading the Bible would still be the right thing to do.  As you begin reading a passage, all of a sudden you are overwhelmed, so overwhelmed, by the all-encompassing, never faltering, love of your God.  He speaks to you like you’ve never been spoken to before.  And in that moment you realize that God has always been there, even in your hopeless little situation.  For me, it was that oh-so-familiar verse that says something like “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.”  This has happened to me more than once, and God has spent far more time than I deserved reaching for me, calling my name and desperately wanting my attention. 

     Back to my quest for the “moment” experience, something to wake me up and end my stupor. The stupor that involves wallowing in depression and longing for new adventures across the seas or finding that one person who will be everything I have ever dreamed and more. (Okay, reality check, I know.) My devotional book speaks of Jesus calling us to pull away from our issues and FOCUS on God (Young, 48).  However, selfish will still wants those worries and questions to be answered. Like right now. Yet, after remembering God’s goodness in the way He reached out to me, I see the truth of this call. We have to, no, we need to, focus on God. 
       
 So, even if God is calling me to bigger and better things,  I know  that right now, I am RIGHT WHERE I BELONG. And realizing that, I find peace.


Sources: Jesus Calling by Sarah Young, 48-49.

Nutritious AND Delicious??

  Hungry? Grab a bran muffin!

      No, seriously though, I wanted to make these because so often I am hungry, but everything around me is full of sugar and does not  do a good job of filling my stomach :). This recipe comes from an awesome elderly lady I met in Bangladesh. She is an amazing cook. I often think of her when I make these, and the comments she made about the doctor saying she 'needs more bran in her diet.' :)

    These muffins are perfect for a nutritious (and delicious) on-the-go breakfast. I like them best for an afternoon snack, especially when supper seems so far away...

• First, put 4 medium bananas in a Ziploc bag and mash them. (you need 2 cups)
• Add: 
• 3  eggs
• 1/3 cup honey
• 1 cup fat-free yogurt
• 1 1/2 tsp. vanilla
• Mix those together, then add:
• 1/3 cup whole wheat flour
• 1 1/2 cup oatmeal
• 3 tsp. baking soda
• 2 cups oat bran (or any other cereal)
• 1 cup medium-chopped pecans
• 1/2 tsp. salt
• Put paper baking cups in your muffin tins then fill them 3/4 full
• Bake at  350 degrees. Toothpick check works best for these. Normally I say everything is better when slightly under-baked, but I have taken these out too early several times, so keep that in mind. 
• Pour yourself a fresh cup of coffee and go spend some time with God!

     Hopefully these can give you some motivation to be healthy! Lysa TerKeurst encourages her readers to think of weight loss as a positive, healthful choice, instead of denying yourself the food you are craving.  Cheers to a victorious week!

                        

A Tribute, to a Life Well-Lived

     How does she do it? Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday morning she walks into the coffee shop, ready to face the day ahead of her. It's still dark outside, the shop is quiet, she might rather be in bed, or in her kitchen making breakfast for her kids. But she does it, with a smile on her face. I think her smile would be best described as joy. But more on this....

     
     You might be wondering who this angel of mercy is. Most folks that frequent the coffee house have met her and know that she comes in these weekday mornings. Her name is Rhonda Shrock. She has blessed me on numerous occasions. I am the sometimes sleepy-eyed, partially awake barista who smiles and gives her a mug for her coffee and a glass of ice water. Once she is settled in her favorite spot, a high table on the platform, I continue to go about my morning tasks. Sometimes, however, I stop in between tasks and just look out across the bar to her table. Sometimes she's folding her hands, eyes shut tight as she gives all her burdens to the One Who won her heart. She's a writer, a columnist with deadlines and a million things she has to do, but this is how she starts her day. She knows the only place her inspiration comes from is God; the only way she can do anything is by the hand of the One Who guides her. 

     
     She is an inspiration in so many ways. I ask again, "How does she do it?" In many ways, Rhonda's  life seems like an easy one. I have entertained thoughts about being a writer someday, and her job seems to be moderately easy. Her articles are generally focused around something God has shown her--someone she talked to or was blessed by, or things that happen with her husband and boys, or  chief and braves as she calls them :) "I could do that," I think to myself. "I could get up early and come to a coffee shop to write."  The more I have grown to know her, however, I see that her life is not as easy as that. She is a busy mother who will face piles of dirty laundry and unwashed dishes when she finishes here. She has a full-time job, besides the work she does for the paper. Her husband owns a business in town, and anyone who has ever owned a business knows how much sacrifice is involved. Not only that, but Rhonda faces trials in life just like everyone else; just like I do. 

   
     So now I am back to asking, "How does she do it?" I long for the joy and peace she seems to have so readily. I long to be attentive to the Spirit the way she is. And then it hits me. Of course I know   how she does it--how she has joy--I just witnessed it. She has God! And she has God because she has sought Him,even in the early hours of the morning. God has filled her, and the radiance on her face is not the makeup she quickly brushed on before she got here, it is the presence of God!
   
   Thank you, Rhonda, for being used by God. He used you to point me back to Him. To be lavished with His love and to be reminded how much I need Him.

~Please do not miss your chance to be blessed! Her beautiful website- http://rhondaschrock.com/